School uniform. A rant

On September 6 both my children go back to school and it feels like someone paid my wages directly to the headteacher's coffers.
I have a bit of an issue with school uniform. It costs a bloody fortune.

It's all very well the big four supermarkets trumpeting on about how you can buy a whole outfit for £4 (yes, really! £4) but what about when your child's school won't let you?

Don't get me wrong, I love that they get to wear a uniform and I know many parents who desperately wish their children did too.
But at my children's' primary school, parents have to buy a badged sweatshirt (£10.50 each), a badged polo shirt (£6.50 each) and a badged sport top (£4.50). Then, of course, there is the badged book bag and PE bag.

And of course, you can never buy one of each (unless you're happy to do a wash and iron every day after work), so my children's' uniform bill for the start of term was around the £50 mark. Each. And that's before I've bought the trousers/skirts/shoes/lunchboxes etc.

Yes, yes, I'm having a rant.

A pack of three polo tops from good old Marks & Spencer (same colour, same style) cost the same as one school equivalent. The quality is no different - if not better - than their expensive alternatives.
I can't even cut out and keep the badge as it is embroidered into the clothes.

Don't even get me started on the day Dan came home from school with a big black marker pen blob slap bang on the chest of his 1-week-old sweatshirt last year.
And how many times has he 'lost' it, having used it as a goalpost/pillow/doorstop at school?
I just thank heaven that I can buy a decent pair of school trousers for £4 from Tesco as the amount of times Dan has come home from school with a hole in the knee, I would be tearing my hair out otherwise.

So I had to chuckle at the research carried out by money saving website VoucherCodes.co.uk on their blog which stated that parents are spending more than they need to on uniform.

Not out of choice over here. I'm more than happy to send my kids to school in Tesco or Sainsbury's or whatever label - if only I could!

So I head for Marks & Spencer's great 3 for 2 deals on trousers, skirts, dresses etc, I've shopped at Tesco and I've raided Sainsbury's for the best deals.

I confess shoes I don't scrimp on (nearly £40 a pair, sob) just because it's proved false economy for me to buy a boy who plays football and tig in the playground every day cheaper shoes. They simply don't last as long. And I've learned this from experience.

So I get my bargains and grumble and grouch at having to fork out more than any parent should have to on the rest of their uniform.

And breathe. Rant over.

* This is a sponsored post.

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Lost

If you have ever lost sight of your children - even for a split second - you will know what that gnawing sick feeling is like that clutches at your very core and makes your insides instantly drop.
Your heart pounds so hard in your chest you can almost hear it roar and your ears seem to pop like you're making the fastest decent in a careering aeroplane.

It's the sort of feeling no parent ever wants to experience.
And it's the sort of feeling you can never understand unless you are a parent.

I lost both of my children while out for a bike ride on Sunday afternoon while walking the 10 minute journey from grandma's house to ours.
One minute they were cycling beside me, giggling, faces in the sun. The next minute they were gone.

I could feel the panic rising inside, taking my very breath away and making my chest tighten.
I actually felt an overwhelming urge to whimper but I tried to remain calm and rational.
I was on my own. It was a quiet Sunday afternoon and everyone was probably having their Sunday dinner, going about their lives.

I was racing up the path where I had last seen them, fighting the urge not to cry and telling myself everything would be OK.

We live on a fairly quiet estate with few roads and lots of open space.

My seven-year-old son is really sensible and will look after his little sister.

I know this, I KNOW this. And yet still I'm fighting tears pricking at the corner of my eyes.

I get a text message from grandma after 10 long minutes to tell me they've cycled back to her house.

Sensible Dan had calmed his crying sister down and told her everything would be OK and he would guide them to safety.

I confess I used cross words when I saw them: Don't ever ride off like that without telling me where you are. Don't ever do that again.

But really, it wasn't their fault. They were safe and I was relieved and proud that they knew what to do.

So this is a warning to anyone and everyone with a child: Don't assume they know what to do if ever they should get lost.

"Find a policeman" isn't going to cut it if they're lost near home or in the supermarket.

I don't know at what age they really understand the importance of this subject - 2, 3, 5, 7?

But start now. It's one of those things that you think will never happen to you, but kids will be kids and it's got to be better to be prepared, right?

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The Gallery: Week 25

Hello and welcome to week 25 of The Gallery.

This week it's going to be tough. There I said it.

Not tough because I'm asking you to think hard or to root back through your dusty old albums.

No, this one is tough for a whole different reason.

Quite a few bloggers are clearly addicted to Blipping, an online daily photo journal. I thought about starting one up myself, but I'm far too lazy/forgetful for that.

So I'm doing it for one day on here. With all of you.

Yes, this week's theme is: One Day in August

Just like the Blip journals, I want you all to take a photo on the same day - OOOOO!

I'm trusting you to be honest here (as I often say to my children!)

So, on Sunday, August 29 (Bank Holiday Sunday if you're here in the UK) I want you to take a photo. Of anything, doesn't matter, you just have to take it on that day.

And you don't even need to use your camera: Take it on your phone while you're out and about?

Of course, Sunday is also the day 3 UK parenting bloggers fly to Bangladesh for a week to help raise awareness of the work Save the Children is doing with mothers and children in one of the most poverty-stricken places on the planet.

Let's mark this inspiring day for Josie, Sian and Eva.

And when the Gallery opens next Wednesday, we will all have taken part in one giant Blip for that day! A living, breathing journal for a Sunday in August.

As always, come back on Wednesday to add your link, visit as many others as you can, say hi, discover new people, welcome them in when they discover you.

Appreciate the wonderful words and photos that are opening themselves up to you.

The link stays open until the following Tuesday, so don't worry if you don't manage to post on Wednesday.

So what are you waiting for, get clicking!

The Gallery

If you're new to The Gallery, here's the brief: I will give you a prompt, an idea, a notion and you go out and take a photograph using that prompt. Or just use a photo you already have.

The prompt could be one word, an object, an idea, a phrase, anything, and you have to post a picture which you feel represents that prompt.

Post it on your blog and write about it.

That's it.

It's not about taking technically brilliant photos - although if you do, I'd love to see them too. It's about having a passion for pictures; any photos, all photos whether you took it with your all singing all dancing SLR or snapped it on your camera phone.
You don't even have to be a blogger to take part - just send me your photo and I will publish it on my blog for you. You don't even have to include your name if you prefer.

When you've published it, come back on Wednesday and via a groovy widget thing you can add a link to your post and share it with everyone. The link remains open for a week.
Visit others, comment if you like them or feel inspired by them. Just go out and encourage and support amateur photographers out there.

The more support you give, the more you will get back.

And if you want to add a pukka linkable Gallery button to your blog (instead of the amateurish one I've been using!) the code is just under The Gallery picture in the right hand column on this blog.

Come back on Wednesday and join in. I can't wait to see what you come up with.

If you want to make sure you don't miss any prompts or entries in future, make sure you subscribe to my RSS or email feed.
Go on, clicky click away, you know you want to ...

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At the age of 7 you learn . . .

To underarm trump

How to get daddy so excited about a PlayStation game that you want, you actually manage to convince him he wants to buy it for himself

About bodies (tee hee hee)

That life isn't always fair

That saving up enough money to buy stuff is hard. But blimey, it's rewarding

That mummy is ALWAYS right

Self awareness

It's time to stop kissing mummy in public (see above)

That boxers are way cooler than pants

That 'girlfriend' is suddenly a word you don't ever want to hear used when describing your friends who are girls

Read more...

The Gallery: A photo I'm proud of

Of course I couldn't pick just one.
One picture I'm proud of? Tut, no way.
So these are photos I'm proud of right now.

As I mentioned previously, I've switched off 'auto' on my dSLR and made the leap to 'manual'.

And while I could have probably taken a photo like the one above before, I don't know how I did it.

This one I was in total control of. The light, the depth of field. I may have whooped when I saw it!

These were taken during a day out at a local National Trust property with Muddy No Sugar and her children.

Gorgeous surroundings, lots of different types of light to play with and a bunch of willing (sort of) models.

The perfect way to learn.

This post is for Week 24 of The Gallery: A Photo I'm Proud Of.

If you're new here and want to know what the Gallery is, go and read here, and then come right back and join in!

I can't wait to see what you come up with.

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Life lessons for your children in 140 characters

We teach them to always brush their teeth, to eat their veggies, to wash their hands when they go to the toilet.

But what about the important lessons; the life lessons that we as parents will send them off into the big wide world with?

What do you want to ensure your children learn from you?

I asked this question of Twitter - In 140 characters, what one life lesson would you like your children to learn from you? - and got these fabulous responses.

What would you add?

@vegemitevix
Persevere. When you get to the end of rope. Make a knot and hang on. x

@Erica
Don't worry, be happy. Most things aren't worth the worry.

@ladysavage80
Never do something just to impress someone else, always try to do things for yourself (whether its tattoos or school subjects!)

@mumrablog
To be brave

Mr Mumra
Be cool, it separates you from everyone else.

@SnoozeShade
To love themselves and be confident when faced with difficult times or people

@MorverenStIves
1. That this MAY be all there is, so cherish it + live it to the full; 2. Same as yours!

@mustntgrumble
The only person in life you can truly rely on is yourself. Be true to that person & you will have as good a life as is possible.

@MuddynoSugar
Respect yourself, and love life.

@LizJarvisUK
Live life to the full and never be afraid to be who you are

@cosmicgirlie
Treat others as you want to be treated. Never be afraid to love; it's the strongest thing out there.

@mummytips
Patience and Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto Yo, and how to cook bacon...

@MommyMoments
To have good manners. Please/Thank You/May I. Manners and being polite can take you a long way in life & help you make friends.

@EnglishMum
To be yourself. And to know that if someone is spiteful, it reflects badly on them and is nothing to do with you.

@ificouldescape
It's okay to make mistakes. Smart people make them all the time. And, learn from them.

@KerrysAvon
To be yourself and honest to yourself and to others and never be afraid of who you are to treat others how you want to be treated

Kerry's other half
Always be yourself no matter what people think of you, and to stand up for what you believe in

@rubyandginger
being nice costs nothing

@nickie72
Choose your words carefully

@ngowers
To always be honest. x

@utterlyscrummy
Lesson for my girls would be: Don't let your critics beat you down, use it as fuel for your creative fire and future success

@spudballoo
each of us is responsible for our own happiness. Life WILL throw crap at you. You can tackle it or let it sink you. Your choice x

@RosieScribble
Size doesn't matter, it's what is one the inside that counts. We are all unique and special and loveable.

@atmccollam
That she can do and be whatever and whoever she wants.

@seasparkle_x
You can make anything happen if you want it enough, don't except the no's, where there is a will there is a way!

@Melaina25
Treat everyone as you wish to be treated.

@becaboop
To see beauty in everything and to be creative in every aspect of life

@snafflesmummy
to love and respect themselves and not rely on other people for it.

@BumblingTweets
Care. About yourself, about others. And never stop moving forward, growing, developing. Don't let anyone hold you back.

@lucyhandprints
Not everyone u meet will be nice so you have to learn how to deal with them and do pelvic floor exercises from ur teens

@Kahanka
I would love my child to learn Czech and everything that comes with it ;)

@Pure_Lanzarote
Treat others how you would like to be treated yourself, manners don't cost anything & get u far-u r never better than anyone else

@JUSTJUGGLING
Never save anything for best. Wear your best clothes n jewellery. Light your scented candles daily life too short to save 4 best

@frugalfamily
What about 'Fail to prepare, prepare to fail'

@InsomniacMummy
I'd like to be able to teach my children never to let other people's prejudices or actions be a measure of their own self worth.

@violetposy
That you can't change someone, if they are self destructive leave.

@Childcareisfun_
To love yourself & always be yourself & to not let anyone change you or try to be somebody else. Individuality is beautiful.

@Mels_World
Do the right thing even if it's the hard thing"...we tell them that all the time & we live by that too. Great Question!

@chrishainey
Don't think that you know nothing. Knowing this is the most important lesson ever

@mirrormirrorxx

Have always said, if she can cook, loves books and speaks French she is guaranteed a lovely life. Am working on it all...

Read more...

At the age of 4 you learn . . .

The art of manipulating daddy. I mean really really manipulating daddy

That mummy is a pushover for a cuddle and a pair of puppy dog eyes

That you can actually live on yoghurt

How mentioning the word 'school' makes mummy's eyes fill up with water.

That money is a strange and wonderful thing. When you try to poke a £10 note between some floorboards, everyone really freaks out.

That lipstick makes you look great, even if you can't actually get it on your lips.

How to use an iPhone better than either of your parents.

That putting nail varnish on mummy's white duvet cover = a telling off

To cuss.

Read more...

The Gallery: Week 24

Hello and welcome to week 24 of The Gallery.

It has been a momentous week for me as a photographer. I've taken the huge step of switching from 'auto' to 'manual' on my digital SLR.

Do you hear that? I no longer shoot on auto.

OK to many of you, you'll be all 'what?' or 'so what?', but ever since being bought a fancy camera for my 40th I've craved the opportunity to take 'proper' photographs. Ones I am in control of. Like the ones you see in magazines.

If you've seen the book which comes with these cameras you'll understand why I've put it off for so long. It's like they're written in Martian and the words swim in front of me and I lose all interest. In life as well as photography.

So I did something pretty fabulous last weekend: I spent the day with a very patient photographer, walking in the sunshine being coached on aperture, shutter speeds and ISO.

What a brilliant way to learn.

I now get it. Sort of.

Jay: "So which bits don't you understand now?"

Me: "All of it."

Yeah, she was very patient.

And a pretty good model too . . .

So many many thanks to Jay for taking the time to do something amazing and thanks too to Muddy, another frustrated photographer and good friend who joined us on our voyage of discovery.

And in case you're wondering, Jay's tongue really was blue. Nothing to do with my photography skills.

So, to this week's theme. I have chosen: A Photo I'm Proud of.

Oooo. Sharp intake of breath!

As always, come back on Wednesday to add your link, visit as many others as you can, say hi, discover new people, welcome them in when they discover you.

Appreciate the wonderful words and photos that are opening themselves up to you.

So what are you waiting for, get clicking!

The Gallery

If you're new to The Gallery, here's the brief: I will give you a prompt, an idea, a notion and you go out and take a photograph using that prompt. Or just use a photo you already have.

The prompt could be one word, an object, an idea, a phrase, anything, and you have to post a picture which you feel represents that prompt.

Post it on your blog and write about it.

That's it.

It's not about taking technically brilliant photos - although if you do, I'd love to see them too. It's about having a passion for pictures; any photos, all photos whether you took it with your all singing all dancing SLR or snapped it on your camera phone.
You don't even have to be a blogger to take part - just send me your photo and I will publish it on my blog for you. You don't even have to include your name if you prefer.

When you've published it, come back on Wednesday and via a groovy widget thing you can add a link to your post and share it with everyone. The link remains open for a week.
Visit others, comment if you like them or feel inspired by them. Just go out and encourage and support amateur photographers out there.

The more support you give, the more you will get back.

And if you want to add a pukka linkable Gallery button to your blog (instead of the amateurish one I've been using!) the code is just under The Gallery picture in the right hand column on this blog.

Come back on Wednesday and join in. I can't wait to see what you come up with.

And if you want to make sure you don't miss any prompts or entries in future, make sure you subscribe to my RSS or email feed.
Go on, clicky click away, you know you want to ...

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The Gallery: A Memory

Ahh, look so cute right?
WRONG. This photo hides something horrible. Something which made me weep and wail and fall out with my husband.
This photo hides my misery.
For, dear internet, this photo hides the time my daughter hacked her hair off.

Just saying it sends a shiver down my spine.

She hunted down the blunt pair of scissors I use to cut the labels out of clothes and cut chunks out of her hair. In the dark.

SHE CUT HER HAIR IN THE DARK

I mean CHUNKS. She looked like a victim of scabies or like she'd been given electric shock treatment. Or like she'd had an argument with an angry lawnmower.

Hubby made it a hundred times worse. "It's only hair," he said. Followed by: "She looks a bit like Max Wall. Anyway it will grow back."
It had taken her more than 2 years to grow the short pixie do she had - all I could do was think about the school photos! The school photos, I'd wobble.

Not convinced? Think I'm being irrational?

Here she is without the top of her head strategically cropped off in the photograph.



Of course she was all 'whatever' without a care in the world.

I think I may have even dressed her in pink a lot that year so no one would mistake her for a boy.

I know, I know, it's only hair and it's not hubby's fault, but I don't mind confessing to you dear internet, I cried. I CRIED.

I mean look at it. She looked like a disaster zone. She looked weird.

I kid you not, she spent that whole summer in a hat.

And obviously I did what any parent would do in these circumstances: I took many many many photos of her first foray into hairdressing to embarrass her in years to come.

This post is for Week 23 of The Gallery: A Memory.

If you're new here and want to know what the Gallery is, go and read here, and then come right back and join in!

I can't wait to see what you come up with.

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Mothers guilt

Until my children were 6 and 3 I worked full time on a busy regional daily newspaper.

I dropped my son off at breakfast club and my daughter at nursery, then raced home at the end of the day hoping to snatch a few moments with them before the bedtime routine.

I felt incredibly guilty.

Two years ago I quit my job to work from home.

It was a Big Decision. I was in a job I adored, on a paper I loved, working with people who inspired and entertained me.

Now I have the opportunity to take my children to school every day.

No breakfast club at the crack of dawn.

No racing down the motorway to make sure I make it in time for nursery closing.

My daughter starts school this September and I can hold her hand every day without having to rearrange annual leave or take copious amounts of holiday.

I still feel guilty.

Our income dropped, our savings got eaten up and I effectively waved goodbye to a great career.

Here's the thing. Well, my thing anyway. I don't think it ever gets any easier, any of it.

Whatever you do, whatever your circumstances you will feel Mothers' Guilt.

I love being a mum. I also love working.

However, it feels like if I try to combine both of these things I've always got a little voice in my head telling me that I'm not doing either of them to the best of my ability.

And I really really hate that.

I know a mother's guilt is a pretty universal thing - no matter what you have, how much money, what career, how big your house is, you will always feel that painful sting of parental guilt, whether you're a mother or a father.

But how do you deal with it? Does anyone think they have the balance right?

Read more...

What is it about dads and their daughters?

Most of the time he's reprimanding her for something, or wondering where on earth she got such a devil-may-care attitude from.

Like trapping herself in a locker while on holiday because she was playing hide and seek.

Or running full pelt into a chain barrier she hadn't seen, stopping her dead in her tracks and causing her to perform an amazing banana skin flip in the air, landing flat on her back.

On hubby's recent 40th birthday, the children chose a card for him; a snake-like creation which folds out to reveal the words: 'to the best daddy in the world'.

As it's thrust into his hands to open, he declares what a lovely thought it is, only for Mia to reply quite matter of factly: "I don't think you are."

He looks crestfallen and quite frankly dumbstruck to which she rolls her eyes and sighs: "Obviously, I didn't mean it . . . "

And then I see them like this.

A perfect moment captured on camera.

And everything she's ever said or done in the past is forgiven. Once again.

Read more...

The Gallery: Week 23

Hello and welcome to week 23 of The Gallery.

I had a week off. I hoped you missed me (!) but now we're back and it's time to dig through your photo albums once again.

So to get straight to the point this week's theme is: A Memory.

Personally I think this is really tough - I mean how do you pick out just one memory to post?

I do however think it's going to be a great one.

It can be a recent memory, one from your childhood, one from your school days. Just a photograph which sparks a real memory whenever you look at the photograph.

As always, come back on Wednesday to add your link, visit as many others as you can, say hi, discover new people, welcome them in when they discover you.

Appreciate the wonderful words and photos that are opening themselves up to you.

So what are you waiting for, get clicking!

The Gallery

If you're new to The Gallery, here's the brief: I will give you a prompt, an idea, a notion and you go out and take a photograph using that prompt. Or just use a photo you already have.

The prompt could be one word, an object, an idea, a phrase, anything, and you have to post a picture which you feel represents that prompt.

Post it on your blog and write about it.

That's it.

It's not about taking technically brilliant photos - although if you do, I'd love to see them too. It's about having a passion for pictures; any photos, all photos whether you took it with your all singing all dancing SLR or snapped it on your camera phone.
You don't even have to be a blogger to take part - just send me your photo and I will publish it on my blog for you. You don't even have to include your name if you prefer.

When you've published it, come back on Wednesday and via a groovy widget thing you can add a link to your post and share it with everyone. The link remains open for a week.
Visit others, comment if you like them or feel inspired by them. Just go out and encourage and support amateur photographers out there.

The more support you give, the more you will get back.

And if you want to add a pukka linkable Gallery button to your blog (instead of the amateurish one I've been using!) the code is just under The Gallery picture in the right hand column on this blog.

Come back on Wednesday and join in. I can't wait to see what you come up with.

And if you want to make sure you don't miss any prompts or entries in future, make sure you subscribe to my RSS or email feed.
Go on, clicky click away, you know you want to ...

Read more...

Plane talking

Mia and I are sitting in a hot, packed aeroplane on our way to a holiday in the sun.

Hubs and Dan are in the row behind playing on the DS reading Beast Quest together.

Mia and I are bored and filling the time by counting how many people we can spot who have just had or are in the middle of a row.

She's leafing through our passports, asking questions about why we need them and why no one seems to care that in in her photo she is 6 months old and bears little or no resemblance to how she looks as a nearly 5 year old today.

She starts pairing the passports up.

Boy goes with boy.

Girl goes with girl.

Grown up goes with grown up.

Child goes with child. Etc

Then she's pairing up those who are married.

Mia: "You go with daddy . . . "

She pauses while she considers her own passport and her big brother's.

Mia: "Can I marry Daniel when I get older mummy?"

Me: "No honey, Daniel is your brother. When you get older you will meet someone who you really really love and you will marry them."

She pauses while this information sinks in.

She's playing with her brother's passport, looking at the photo page, deep in thought.

Mia: "But I'll never love anyone as much as I love Daniel. Not ever."

And anyone people watching on that aeroplane that day saw a mum hug her little girl just a little tighter than usual and have 'I could MUNCH her right up' flash in neon over my head.

Read more...

Proud

Look in the dictionary and leaf through the pages until you find the 'P's, then run your finger down the words:

Proteus

Protocol

Protractor

Protrude

Until you land on Proud.

Proud: Adj. Feeling oneself greatly honoured. Feeling deep pleasure or satisfaction as a result of the achievements, qualities of someone with whom one is closely associated.

That is me.

Proud of the thoughtful, sensitive, generous son I have.

Proud of the man I'm confident he will become.

Proud.

Read more...

The Gallery: Winners

Hello and welcome to The Gallery.

There will be no theme this week as I'm away and I need a rest!

It takes it out of me thinking up these themes you know . . . !

But what I will give you is the winner of the Green & Black's sponsored theme 'Nature'.

The standard was high. Really really high.

So thank goodness I had a guest judge in the shape of Mrs W from Clinically Fed Up to help out.

She's a great supporter of The Gallery, a fantastic photographer and she gamely offered to forego any chance of winning said chocolate to offer her services as a judge.

All I had to do was whittle the 124 entries down to 10 and she would pick a winner from those.

Except I couldn't. I whittled it down to 22.

Tut.

But we have a winner. A very very worthy winner I think you will agree.

Drum roll please . . .

First prize goes to: Chez Spud who yelled 'STOP THE CAR' to get her entries! Here is just one of the corkers she posted.

Spud, thank you. You will be the proud recipient of an organic Green & Black's hamper. Try not to eat it all at once!

And for anyone who wants to create a similar look, Mrs W has promised to point us in the direction of some free tools. When she returns from her US holiday where she has been languishing . . .

But that's not all.

There are 12 runners up, who each get a pack of Green & Black's Milk Miniatures.

Congratulations one and all and thanks to each and every one of you for joining in the fun.

Stop, Pause, Rewind Play

Continental Fairy

Very Annie Mary

Where The Brass Bands Play

Insomniac Mummy

Barefoot in the Kitchen

What Did You Do Today Mama

Incessant Ramblings

Thinly Spread

I'm Not a Colour

Mumra

Vegemite Vix

The Gallery will return next Friday.

The Gallery

If you're new to The Gallery, here's the brief: I will give you a prompt, an idea, a notion and you go out and take a photograph using that prompt. Or just use a photo you already have.

The prompt could be one word, an object, an idea, a phrase, anything, and you have to post a picture which you feel represents that prompt.

Post it on your blog and write about it.

That's it.

It's not about taking technically brilliant photos - although if you do, I'd love to see them too. It's about having a passion for pictures; any photos, all photos whether you took it with your all singing all dancing SLR or snapped it on your camera phone.
You don't even have to be a blogger to take part - just send me your photo and I will publish it on my blog for you. You don't even have to include your name if you prefer.

When you've published it, come back on Wednesday and via a groovy widget thing you can add a link to your post and share it with everyone. The link remains open for a week.
Visit others, comment if you like them or feel inspired by them. Just go out and encourage and support amateur photographers out there.

The more support you give, the more you will get back.

And if you want to add a pukka linkable Gallery button to your blog (instead of the amateurish one I've been using!) the code is just under The Gallery picture in the right hand column on this blog.

Come back on Wednesday and join in. I can't wait to see what you come up with.

And if you want to make sure you don't miss any prompts or entries in future, make sure you subscribe to my RSS or email feed.
Go on, clicky click away, you know you want to ...

Read more...

Little girls fashion. A rant

I never rant. Well not much anyway. Well all right I do, but I mainly reserve it for when idiot TV execs replace an episode of my favourite show with the football or I get a snotty letter from school telling me I'm jeopardising my son's education by taking him out of school on a Friday afternoon.

Other than that, I pretty much left life wash over me.

But I confess there is another subject which makes my blood boil and has me tutting under my breath and ranting to anyone standing within a couple of feet of me at the store:

Little girls clothes.

Little girls inappropriate clothes.

Little girls clothes that try to make your little girl look nothing like a little girl.

My own little girl is 4.

The minute she turned 4 it seemed the clothes available to her dramatically changed.
Gone were the cute as a button dresses and adorable tops, only to be replaced with joggers emblazened with 'foxy' across the bottom or 'fashion' tops I've seen teenagers wear.


Of course I'm exaggerating slightly but it felt that 4 was a threshold in the clothing world and they expected my still-not-at-school-yet girl to dress, well, like a teenager.

I have honestly struggled in some shops to find something which isn't trying to make her look older.

I don't want her to look older, I want her to look 4.

She wants to wear princess shoes and dresses last seen on The Railway Children.

She wants comfortable jeans not skinny jeans. She wants shoes she can climb trees in, not ones similar to the pair her 14-year-old cousin wears.

I just want her to look like a little girl.

Oh and dress like a vet. Obviously.

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The Gallery: Playtime

My 7 year old has a PlayStation 3.

He saved up his pocket money for weeks and weeks and weeks to help buy it and when it finally arrived he would have punched the air and whooped if he knew that's what you do when you are THAT excited about a much-wanted gift.

However, I've only got to give the merest hint, a tiny suggestion, that we could play a different game together and he'd dropped that controller like a hot potato and is racing to wherever the fun is being promised.

Chess.

Snowball fights.

Footy in the garden.

Cricket (even when grandma offers!)

And his big love: rugby.

And if it means my boy keeps that love of playtime for years to come, I'll happily stand in goal/field/act as a target for snowballs for as long as he wants me to!

This post is for Week 21 of The Gallery: Playtime

If you're new here and want to know what the Gallery is, go and read here, and then come right back and join in!

I can't wait to see what you come up with.

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How Wonderful Life Is, Now You're in the World

"I hope you don't mind, that I put down in words,

How wonderful life is now you're in the world"

Elton John, Your Song

When my son was born this is the song I used to sing to him.

Over and over.

It must have been on the radio at the time because it really stuck and became the song which defined our early days together.

I would mime the words because my voice would crack with emotion and tears prick my eyes as I said the line 'how wonderful life is now you're in the world' because it truly was how I felt when I held my first baby in my arms at the age of 34.

Then I had the Baby Blues 'crash'. I recall my husband coming home from work one day to find me sitting on the toilet seat in our bathroom, our sweet baby in my arms, and me sobbing my heart out.

And when he asked what was wrong I honestly could not tell him. Or I couldn't find the words to tell him. Or there were just too many words to tell him.

But it was a very black moment which now sits in my memory as a marker for how motherhood can be a very lonely, frightening, overwhelming experience, no matter what your age, experience or personality.

Luckily I climbed out of that crash.

Now I have two children - one in school, one about to start this September - and I am in a whole other place.

I feel comfortable, content, confident even.

I look back on those days and wonder how I got through it all, how I functioned, how on earth we stayed married when I felt like I was this whole other person and how could I ever be expected to be the girl he married when I felt so alone and so different.

I look back on those days now and realise it was all a learning curve. The highs and the lows have made me the person I am now.

I read two posts recently from two different women - Josie and Anon - who are in that dark place at the moment and wanted so much to show them that it does get better; easier; more enjoyable. It really really does.

It's not overnight. And it may get worse before it gets better. But just knowing that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, that you will one day feel something other than despair can be enough to help spur you on.

It's only now I am in my 40s do I feel that motherhood 'fits' me.

You don't ever lose that feeling of being all at sea, you just learn to live with it.

I listened to Your Song again yesterday (this version by of all people by the actor Ewan McGregor from the movie Moulin Rouge) and it made me cry. Big tears of love and remembrance and joy and sadness as I recall those days when I too was lost and in need of something, someone, anyone, words, comfort, a hand on my back, love.

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